Here’s to every daughter of the King. Trained to walk in the right path and is living a righteous life. Yet at one point, things changed. You had that turning point. You do not pray anymore. You don’t read the Bible anymore, no devotions everyday. You find Saturday practices as obligation or duty. Sleep very late on Saturday nights. You come late often on Sunday Service. Do not attend Prayer Meetings. And other gatherings you used to attend wholeheartedly.
Lost. You know you’re lost. Yet you cannot do anything about it. You know how to go back. But you can’t move. You know where to go back and what to do. But you cannot take the first step. Like, something is dragging you down in the middle of nowhere.
Darkness. Everything you see is black. Past sins. Every ugly thing you did while taking the road to a place called Lostdom.
Rain. You set the time for your comeback. But you’re getting used to this new life. Like you’re waiting for a rain or maybe even a storm. Bring the rain is your theme song. Rain has not come yet but you are cold as ice already. Hard as stone also.
Envy. You look at them, your sisters. Asking yourself, ‘why’. Does He love them more than you? Lesson. You wanted to say a lot. You want to care for them- them who are younger than you, who were less exposed in the real world.
I hope that you won’t take the path that I took. I pray that you will make the right decisions in life. That you will first seek God’s help in all your ways. That you can stand on your own when needed. That you will never lose the confidence and self-esteem you have. That you feel complete and loved by your family. That you don’t have to seek attention from anyone outside your home. That you feel and know that you are beautiful. That you are beautiful – more beautiful with your clothes on. That you will find a guy who is man enough to pursue you at the right time. That you will forgive those who have hurt you in the past. And I pray that you’ll manage well the time, talents and treasures given to you. That you can set your priorities right. Last, I pray that you will understand that it is not necessary to be perfect right now but you have to have a heart that is willing to be changed by God. I pray that you’ll have and enjoy all the best things this life has to offer.
P.S. If you’ve taken the same path I took, please don’t get used to this life, don’t be lazy to take action. Don’t be a dead fish. And do let go of guilt, of pain, of hatred. Don’t be shy to come home. Father’s waiting, dear princess.